Scams and shams

A couple of weeks back a large A4 envelope turned up in the post! It was not the usual thickness of a returned manuscript, nor too thin to just enclose a single sheet of paper denoting another rejection. This was thick, cardboardy... this was going to be good. A publishers name printed on the envelope. Hope soared.

I ripped open the envelope, and two think folders were enclosed, emblazoned with 'Publishing Contract'! My heart skipped a beat, a squeal came out. Was this really happening? Oh My God! So quickly! My book must be good!

I did a little dance and skip around the living room. This was incredible.

And then I took the covering letter out and read it.

'Your manuscript was brought to our attention at the latest board meeting when we discussed it's potential...I can confidently state that your children's book was found to be an enjoyable story..'

WOW! Feedback. Fantasist feedback. And then lower down the letter - they couldn't offer me a non-contributory contract, due to the nature of the market, but a 'partnership' was on the cards. If I contributed between £2000 and £3000 and decided if I wanted a paperback or hardback book I would have a deal on my hands. They would look after the printing costs, the marketing, the distribution connections. Just for a small fee from me...

Now I've never heard of authors being asked for money and this automatically put a big red flag up. How would I know whats best in the market- hardback or paperback, surely a publisher would be best placed to make that decision?

So trusty google came to the rescue. Austin Macauley Publishers Ltd! Let's see what the world had to say about them. Article after article, comment feed after feed commenting on them as vanity publishers, taking money to upload your manuscript on to their own website- one that's unlikely to ever even get any views, never mind make your money back or make a profit. A scam essentially. A swindle. Cheating and stealing.

What's great is that my instinct and gut told me if it's too good to be true it is- what's even better is that the lovely folk of the internet confirmed my suspicions. But what they didn't steal from my pocket they stole from my soul. The initial thrill and happiness, the delight in the feeling of recognition and success. So now I'll be more careful when I open a thick envelope.

And when they open their thick envelope they'll find a letter that starts like this:

'Thank you for your letter and enclosed contract, after my latest board meeting, where the contents of your paperwork was discussed... I can confidently state that your proposition was found to be utterly ridiculous and a blatant scam...

Meat Party

It's been a little while since I've written on the blog. I'm not losing interest or getting lazy, it's just I don't want to write about any lack of progress or rejections I'm getting. All of which is actually the current status quo
! But as I've written before, nothing worth doing comes easy, so I'm here waiting patiently for that one elusive agent to give me the green light. In the meantime I'm still trying to network and spread the message about my book. You just never know when it may fall onto the right ears. Like over the weekend Halo and Flake got invited to a BBQ- well I did too, but I'm sure they were the main intended guests.

Of course they RSVP'd and made their way over to Acton, London for a glorious party in the garden of a great friend of mine. We came with our shopping bag full of ciders, cheesecake, limes, snacks and dips. Despite the promises of rain and clouds the day turned out to be fantastic. Hot sun graced us with it's presence, and my sister and I lit the fire whilst the boys wondered around the garden sniffing nooks and crannies. This is the first time in 28 years I've ever lit a fire. I don't know if you'e ever used a BBQ that doesn't belong to you, but let me tell you, it's hard work. Grills that don't fit the pit, chicken that burns on contact, burgers falling into the fire.But despite the issues I found solutions to our problems, all I had to do was look around. I wondered over to the oven and got the rack out, I found a fish fry net, unfolded it and spread it across the giant expanse of the pit to add height, and hey presto, burgers didn't fall in any longer, chicken remained a lovely brown. So what I'm trying to say is, whatever difficulties you have, no matter the urgency, something can always be done. You don't have to be a hero and save the grilled meat, but certainly doing nothing shouldn't be an option.

So Halo and Flake enjoyed bread-stick crumbs, slivers of chicken and a sneaky piece of cheese. Memories for me, fun for them and inspiration for the next book.

Rejection

So the rejection emails and manuscript returns have started coming in. Two weeks after sending out dozens upon dozens of submissions the very much expected 'Sorry, but this isn't what we are looking for' have started coming in. I can't say I'm not disappointed, it's never nice to see in black and white that you're not good enough, but no one said this would be easy, and a children's book about dogs obviously isn't for everyone.
But what advice or insight can I give you? Only that perseverance pays off- if you plug away enough at something, if you knock on every door and mention in the some obscure situations, something will definitely come of it even if it's not what you imagined in the first place.

So a printed copy of the book was given to a client of mine- a security manager in a well respected and global hotel chain. Not for any other reason then to be nice, and maybe get some feedback. Off he went and gave my little treasure to his little treasures! They read it, and I'm told were delighted with the story. Now this kind gentleman calls to say that his children liked it so much he will try and get his hotel chain to take a bulk order of books (subject to a tweak here and there to mention their name) to give away as goody bags for their young clientele. What a dream, just a chance encounter and fingers crossed I will have my first order. What I'm getting at is not gloating that I have some great connections, but simply that you just never know where chances and opportunities can come from. So the moral of this story is that even if things don't work out the way you imagine, know deep down that they will work our even better than you hoped.

And here's wishing us all our very own chance bulk orders in whatever we do!

'I'm afraid this didn't grab me, and I must pass'

'Regretfully, I am unable to offer you my services'

'Many thanks but not for our list'

'My client list is currently full'

Printed

The book has been printed! OMG! It's getting closer! Well it hasn't been printed by a publisher or an agent but I've gone and ordered 50 copies of my own so that I can finally see the fruits of my labour. I've written my covering letter and selected my shortlist of agents. All I need now is the book to arrive and to get a jumbo set of stamps and envelopes. Eeeeek. I'm trying not to set my hopes too high, and prepare myself for rejection, but I love my little book baby and I just can't see why everyone else would't.

Here's a preview of the cover. What do you think?

Does this look like something a child would read? That a parent would pick up and buy? That a publisher would be interested in?

Lets hope so!

Let kids be kids

Today I'm designing the book cover. It's so exciting, it's like putting on new clothes, or getting a haircut, doing makeup or wearing wonderful shoes for the first time. It's a special kind of newness feeling, where you're showing the world how lovely something can be. And this book cover is like all the above, it's the chance to catch someone's eye, to make them look twice, stop and be intrigued.
That's why the pressure is so immense to get it right. This is what will hopefully make a agent stop and pick it up from their mountain of post instead of flinging it to the side... Or so I hope at least... No I'm sure it will. If other people can do it, if Waterstones is packed with books from floor to ceiling with authors that go beyond the extremely talented and lucky JK Rowlings and Roald Dahl then I know that I can get there too. And why not? Why shouldn't it be me? I am just as determined and mindful, I hope I'm talented and I'm certainly driven so it's going to happen. My cover will make it onto shelves, hugging the simple but kind story of Halo and Flake.

Which gets me thinking, Has anyone else noticed how children's stories nowadays are no longer actually aimed at children? With ulterior motives behind their plots, humor aimed for audiences far above the age range the stories were designed for? When did the good old days of innocent adventures of wolves and pigs turn into the multitude of sexual innuendos and characters called Lord Farquaad (fuc*ward)? It's like writers and producers only really do care about lining their pockets and no more about preserving children's 'purity' for a better word.
I don't have kids but I know I wouldn't want my children's heads filled with most of the garbage that's out there now.

Let's go back to the days of when I was little and teach them using dolls and games. Let them have fun cooking, playing with cars, trains and bikes. Let children have memories of making arts and crafts, drawing pictures, playing in the puddles and reading Halo and Flake :)

Emotions

Don't you think it's funny that animals all have their own personalities? I mean real, distinguishable characters- some are naughty, some cheeky, shy, forward, aggressive. But even more subtle then that, they have their own quirks and subtleties. For example Flake and Halo had a guest today. A six month old baby. This little boy can't yet walk and talk but was the bravest little man I've met in a while. He stared in the face of Flake, not flinching, and let me tell you, Flake is considerably bigger than him. He grabbed his ears and confidently looked straight into the doggies eyes, silently saying, I can take you on!

Flake on the other hand desperately tried to woo him, kissing him, nudging him and ultimately trying to have his naughty way with him. All whilst Halo just looked on from afar, chilled and indifferent. Why? Why did one not let a moment pass without showing his affections, whilst the other couldn't care less? How come animals are far more complex then we give them credit for? They have such a wide range of emotions and often are not scared to show them- and all with 100% genuineness. When they're happy they bound and leap, when they're sad they have unblinking watery eyes. Suspicious, curious, angry, guilty, content... Every human emotion we know can be mirrored in animals. All be it some more than others, but I couldn't be more certain that in one way or another they all feel the same as us.

So why don't humans feel so freely like Halo and Flake? How come we don't show our emotions as openly as they do? What is it that people are afraid of revealing. Perhaps a vulnerability or shame..? But why, we all have these feelings and emotions, its obviously just a part of being alive.
So my advice to you today, is don't hide a thing. Laugh as loud as you want, cry as deeply as you need and take a leaf out of Flake's book- show unrestrained and copious amounts of love.

Lone Wolves

The illustrations for the book have been completed. I'm so proud of the story, it's really come to life, but now I'm doubting myself... the artwork hasn't been done by me and right now I feel that these images are even better than the story! So am I technically a fraud by using someone else's talent to make my own better.

This leads me to think- can anyone truly do something alone? Completely unaided by anyone? Well perhaps not do- but succeed? I tried to think of some scenarios where a sole being is able to accomplish and excel all on their lonesome.

Athletics- that's a lone sport. These people use their own will and strength and determination to push their minds and bodies to extremes. Any medals and accolades they win must surely be their own? Nope. Trainers who teach and motivate, mums and dads who finance running shoes and active wear or even nudge their son or daughter awake at 5am for a training session, employers who lets them have days off to complete, therapists who massage sore damaged muscles. This isn't a lone accomplishment. It's a machine, the cogs that helps the wheel to turn.

How about a business owner? They thought of the business, they made their plan, they implemented the processes to get it off the ground, they found a premise or created their online plane... but then what? No business is going to be successful without staff, without customers, without readers, subscribers, promoters, agents. 

So what does this all mean? What it means that we are all intertwined. No matter how much we credit our own success, and by enlarge this is certainly the biggest part of any fruitful venture, we do always need the help of others.

So don't feel guilty to ask for help, don't fret if you scratch someone's back and they scratch yours. 

As I was once told- Don't Work Harder, Work Smarter.